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Saturday, January 3rd, 2004
7:52 pm - *Friends Only now*


F R I E N D S O N L Y



For privacy reasons my journal is now friends only. If you'd like to be added just leave a comment. ^v^

~Lady Tina
16 Tears * Rip my wings
Friday, November 28th, 2003
9:34 am - Meet me after Midnight... (Day after Thanksgiving)
I was never really a huge Thanksgiving person. Back when I was an omnivore I preferred chicken to turkey,a lot of my family I love but I just have nothing to say to, and lastly...I don't think that you need one day with a huge feast to say that you are thankful for what you have. My lovie agrees with me on this one <3
I almost skipped Thanksgiving and laid in bed all day watching movies but then I realized that even if Thanksgiving means little to me it means a lot to people like my grandmother so out of respect I went...and smiled =) The morning was different than a normal morning and I kept thinking that it was a Sunday. Mark and I barely talked until evening so neither of us were overjoyed. Later I found out that he had sobbed a few times. Aww. I wish that I could have held him then, and everytime that he felt sad. I don't like being apart from him when he's saddened.
Hrm...for food I had: Mashed potatos (delicious ones that my uncle made),turnip,green beans with tomatos,cranberry sauce & Amish cinnamon friendship bread.

I gave in and made a list of things that I'm thankful/happy for:

1. Having my dear loving Mark in my life <3 My sweet dark fiance & angel.

2. Having my mother, my best friend, and non-romantic soulmate. She has always been there for me and I really appreciate that <3

3. Having true friends, like Thomas, who truly understand me. <3

4. Having all of my beautiful cats and little hamsters.

5. The creation of pale face powder and dark eye make-up.

6. Goth music existing

current mood: thankful
Rip my wings
Wednesday, November 19th, 2003
4:56 pm
An update from...me? Shocking. The countdown begins! Mark returns in 20 days and I'm very excited. Things have been pretty dull since he left and we are way more prone to argue while being apart. Arguments occur about everything under the full moon: Corsets, e-mails, something that he said, something that I said, etc. This isn't like us at all Right now things are looking up, we've been planning what to do the first week that he's here. Both being spontaneous little bats, I'm sure that we won't stick to the plans (not that I mind at all).
Erin and I saw A Midsummer Night's Dream on November 15th, which was a beautiful play with some not so good acting. When all else fails, there are Krispy Kreme donuts! I feel like we've gotten to know eachother a bit better over the past 2 weeks. It's not awkward to talk to her and she hates the millions of people that all appear to be clones of one or two people as much as I do. Before taking the PSAT's at the High School she said that she had never been into a Public school, and really noticed how sad and sheep-like the majority of people are. I am happy to be homeschooled. Maybe I am a bit more narcissistic and egotistical then I even realized =P Caramel Swirl Latte please.
Three people in my family are very ill right now which has left me worried and slow about going through with plans I make with people. My grand-uncle has a disease that's fatal, my grandfather has a rare kind of pneumonia and heart disease, and my grandmother has something wrong with her gall bladder. It's just sad to see them ill and the rest of my family so nervous.

~Lady Tina


Rozz <333 R.I.P



CDocumentsandSettingsLindsayMyDocumentsMyPictures13_lilith.gif
You are Lilith the vampire. You love blood and the
night.


Which Evil Girl Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

current mood: exhausted
3 Tears * Rip my wings
Wednesday, November 5th, 2003
3:58 pm - The rain is so lovely.
Today is another lovely,chilly,rainy Autumn day in New England. Some trees are bare and others covered in blood red or pumpkin orange leaves. I love this time of year.
Blood is dripping from my private areas and I am not having my period...it must be from taking the pill. Still it's odd and irritating. I just finished the dreaded period! Do I really need more womanly blood to drip?
For the past few weeks I have been getting stressed and saddened on and off, mainly because of Mark basically telling me that I can no longer be friends with Matt. If Mark didn't mean so much to me I would have never given up a person like Matt who has such a profound effect on me, even if he does indeed have feelings for me. This whole thing bothers me so much and continues to come up atleast once a week. Matt, the little dark elf. *Sighs*
I wish that I could be in Edgell grove Cemetery right now, resting my head against the most beautiful gravestone that I could find and drifting off into deep thought. That would be very comforting, along with an icecream.

current mood: content
5 Tears * Rip my wings
Friday, October 31st, 2003
12:48 pm
Greetings everyone and Happy Halloween!

current mood: amused
1 Tear * Rip my wings
Wednesday, October 29th, 2003
4:41 pm - First Post! October 29th '03

Hello everyone -
Here is the dreaded first post ^v^ The Community info page/profile has the rules, which there really aren't many at all. They aren't very difficult to follow, or atleast I don't think so.
This Friday is Halloween and I do not have many plans. I will stay in, much on some candy and watch some of my favourite movies including...

- Omen IV: The Awakening
- Evil Dead
- Interview with the Vampire
- Vampire Hunter D
- House of 1000 Corpses
- Nosferatu

What do you plan on watching this Hallow's Eve? Is the new Texas Chainsaw Massacre good or terrible as I assumed it would be?

I look forward to reading your posts.

-Tina


current mood: creative
1 Tear * Rip my wings
Sunday, October 19th, 2003
5:39 pm - Monsters and Lullabies
I have Juliet, my raven black kitty, on my lap whilst I write this. Earlier I wrote a nice long entry but the computer froze so here I am, re-writing the entire thing. Nothing wonderful has happened over the weekend that I should tell you about, but it wasn't bad either. I did some of my homeschooling work, gathering more things for my Black Death project. 'Tis nice researching and gathering a lot of information and graphics/pictures.
On Saturday I rented Dracula: the Dark Prince for the third time this year, I adore that movie so much. 'Twas nice watching it cuddled up in a blanket eating cookie dough bites. Speaking of movies, I also watched The Elephant Man (obviously based on true story, the Elephant man of London). Watching it brought tears to my eyes and made me feel such compassion. Imagine having such awful physical deformities while living in a world full of cold hearts and closed minded people...
My uncle and mother were tossing around the idea of switching homes but the rent at the apartments in Ashland would cost too much for us. I would be more disappointed but I know that we'll find a place soon enough, hopefully close to another beautiful Cemetery.

current mood: cynical
Rip my wings
Friday, October 17th, 2003
10:10 pm
Reading Emily(smalldoll)'s journal inspired me to write an entry mentioning Halloween. I love and hate this occasion at the very same time, but it still remains my favourite Holiday. I dislike how people get all excited to dress up this one day a year then glare and snicker at people for dressing up the rest of the year. All of the nice hair dyes being sold out doesn't make matters any better really.
'Tis so fun to be able to find Fishnet tights,striped tights,bat pendants,skulls and skeletons,cheap horror movies,long velvet skirts,and a better selection of dark lipsticks in stores that normally you can only find only one good pair of tights (on a LUCKY day). Even if some of the tights aren't Danskin quality, they are so cheap that you can stock up on many pairs. Hot Topic's tights aren't anything to drool about and they are 8.95 or so, where these tights are 2.95 or less! I love the cool crisp autumn air, how the leaves look fallen over gravestones,the bare trees that will soon be covered in ice & snow, how dark it gets at an early hour,all of the horror movies on Cable TV and how everything is so poetry inspiring. Why can't every month be October? Soon the things that I so love will be replaced with porcelain Jesus figures,golden tinsel, and reindeer. And 'tis too bad that friends seem to fade and drift away, along with the awful warm weather.
On a more positive note...the day that Mark comes back gets closer and closer! I really hope that he gets this job at a Mexican restaurant, I am keeping my fingers crossed and sending positive vibes. I hope you do the same.




victorian
You're a Victorian-era corset. How refined.


What corset are you?
brought to you by Quizilla
HASH(0x870f9b0)
You're a vinyl/fetish corset. Grrrrowl.


What corset are you?
brought to you by Quizilla
2 Tears * Rip my wings
Wednesday, October 15th, 2003
11:09 pm - Interesting...
Great Scot!  You&apos;re &apos;Macbeth!&apos;
Great Scot! You're 'Macbeth!'


Which famous Shakespeare play are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

garg
You are Form 4, Gargoyle: The Fallen.

"And The Gargoyle mended his wings from the
blood of the fallen so he could rise up from
imprisonment. With great speed and
resourcefulness, Gargoyle made the world his
for the taking."


Some examples of the Gargoyle Form are Daedalus
(Greek) and Mary Magdalene (Christian).
The Gargoyle is associated with the concept of
success, the number 4, and the element of wood.
His sign is the new moon.

As a member of Form 4, you are a creative and
resourceful individual. You are always
thinking of possible solutions to problems you
face and you generally choose one that is
right. Much of your success comes from your
ability to look at things a little differently
than everyone else. Gargoyles are the best
friends to have because they don't always take
things for face value.


Which Mythological Form Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla
Rip my wings
Monday, October 13th, 2003
6:26 pm - "Things I fancy, just like Nancy"
Like Mark, I will probably only be writing one real entry a week from now on. *Shakes head* There are so many things in my head, yet I can't bring them out with words and still make sense. I know my entries get a bit repetitive, there is just less motivation for me to write journal entries without Mark here.
On Friday I took little Crystal to *gasp* the mall to make up for me not being the kind of sister that likes to run around screaming. Our first stop was into K.B. toys where an extremely enthusiastic smiley worker greeted us and followed us around the store bothering poor Crystal. Being a friendly employee is nice and all, but not when you seem almost like a child molester. I bought Crystal an art set and then went to the dreaded play area to let her run around.
There were many mothers who crowded in a corner to whisper and glare at me, which personally made me feel like utter shit. I am used to being stared at and usually don't even notice it anymore, but they were just so impolite and obnoxious. I didn't have a hook in hand about to gut their children as they pranced by, I was just sitting there to let my sister play. After I'd had enough of that we ate lunch and went to Spencer's where I found a beautiful coffin box with roses and a skull to buy. I did take a look in Hot Topic just to see if they had anything and actually found a PVC skirt which was only $25 (not bad for that store). I was glad to be out of there. Going to the mall is such a typical suburban activity. I find myself getting more and more bitter towards closed minded people. *tightens fist*
Things with Mark (my love <333) are going really well. He's started talking about coming here for a few days on his Thanksgiving break if he gets a job soon which would be oh so nice. If that did happen then it would only be a week 'til he came back for an entire month. If it were highschool he probably would have taken the week inbetween off, but he has College finals during that time.
Like I was writing in Mark's letter, until this year Thanksgiving was just a dreaded holiday between Hallow's eve and Winter Solstice. Now, suddenly, I realized how much I have to be thankful for. This will be a more meaningful Thanksgiving then ones in the past. Life is too short to dread everything and be a gloom cookie like I am at times. Look at my uncle Stevie who is dying of Lou Gehrig's disease, I wish that I had known him better before he got sick. Time is so valuable and precious. I know now why people decide not to hold grudges or stay distant from people they know because you never know when your last moment with someone will be. I will spend every minute, every second, with Mark wisely. I'm not just talking about Winter but about my whole life. We'll always be together and one, even after death. True love never dies...

~Tina

current mood: nostalgic
1 Tear * Rip my wings
Sunday, October 5th, 2003
10:29 pm
I'm here to update you on my life and what's going on.
Saturday my mother woke me up around 5:30 - 6:00 am to get ready for our Yard sale, which just about killed me. Personally I'd like to be going to bed around 4:00 - 5:00, not waking up then. The only things that kept me awake and motivated were coffee,sugar,and thoughts of making money.
I had a lot of things for sale including: A beautiful dark wooden jewelry box that had stained glass on the front, a few books by Anne Rice,a Poppy Z. Brite book,many Occult books,video tapes that I don't enjoy,brand new and almost brand new cosmetics,Halloween and Autumn decorations,two Poloroid cameras,a never used optical silver/purple computer mouse, handbeaded dark/gothy jewelry, A skull scarf/bandana that I just wouldn't wear...etc. If you'd like a list of the things that I still have left over I could send it to you. I'm going to sell off everything for less than $4.00 (not including shipping if sold online). The most pricy item is $3.00, the good sized beautiful jewelry box.
The idea of digging through peoples things on their lawn at 7:30 in the morning is so foreign to me. I wouldn't want to be doing such things until atleast Noon. I was stuck dealing with most of the unfriendly people because of my mothers people induced "allergies." 'Twas 38 degrees that morning and mum wrapped herself in a coat and a towel. I just wore a black, light autumn trench coat and was fine. It's interesting how peoples body temperatures can run so differently. Mark's hands are always as cold as ice and what is comfortable to me is too cold for him. I remember when we shared a bed over the Summer, once I was finally comfortable with the Airconditioner on high he would be curled up in a little ball under the comforter. He looked so adorable...I miss that.
I look forward to this December curling up next to him with a blanket and drinking hot cocoa,coffee,or tea in front of the fireplace. December, come now! I'm growing impatient.
This was another emotional weekend for me, thank the Goddess it's ending and better now. And thank my love for making me the beautiful avatar <333

Take care.

Tina

current mood: excited
3 Tears * Rip my wings
Tuesday, September 30th, 2003
12:56 pm
April 3

Full of charm
gifted
without egoism
likes to draw attention
loves life
motion
unrest and even complications is both dependent and independent
good taste
artistic
passionate
emotional
good company
does not forgive.

Get yours at pressanykey.com
1 Tear * Rip my wings
Monday, September 29th, 2003
8:57 pm
Presently, I'm VERY angry with my grandmother. Matt came over to watch movies and hang out the other night. She then knocked on the door to my mum's part of the house and asked "WHAT is going on?!" Mum was confused and asked what she was talking about. My grandmother responded "Matt's car is here! Where is he?" and she began to flip out because he was in my room upstairs with me, *le gasp* alone.
First of all, 'tis pretty obvious that we're just friends. And what is the big deal? If she opened the door to my room without knocking she would just see both of us sitting on almost opposite sides of my bed watching a movie. There is nothing "going on." She went as far as telling my mother that she can't stand people coming in and out of the house at all hours, and that it's turning into a whore house and I am the whore. This is all pretty humorous...as I JUST had my friend over and he came over at 8:00 pm. I almost never have people over. "It just doesn't look good!" she snapped. But anyway, that is overwith.
Mark & I were having some personal issues that are resolved now. *Sigh of relief* And that makes me happy. A lot of the things that he was saying to me were making me very worried about him and his health :'( It was making me furious that he was/is so far away from me. I just wanted to hold him and kiss his tears away, then cook him a meal and give him a glass of water. But yes, everything is fine now. We both came to a compromise and made decisions on the things that were bothering him and I. In the past week we've gotten a lot stronger and my love for him has tripled <333
I'd love to go outside with him right now for an evening walk and just breathe in the crisp autumn air. We could walk into the night together, holding eachother, and walk to St.George's cemetery for some intimacy ;) then talk for hours and play on the swings at the playground. I can't wait to do that again. Soon enough. Soon enough.

Love,
Tina

current mood: loved
1 Tear * Rip my wings
Friday, September 26th, 2003
12:43 pm
My journal says I'm 52% feminine.
What does your LJ writing style say about your gender?
LJ Gender Tool by hutta
Rip my wings
12:18 pm - Make love,take love,break love...
Dear Diary,
Finally an update from me. Since Mark left I've been less enthusiastic about writing entries, as not much goes on anymore outside of waiting for his return and doing homeschooling work.
Things with Mark and I are great. The past few weeks we've grown even closer and talked on the phone every night at Midnight for around 2 hours. I love curling up under the black covers and just hearing his voice before I go to sleep. It's really enjoyable and I look forward to it every day now =) I look forward to everything with my Mark <3
I met someone new from Gothic personals,David. He seems really intelligent and not perverted (he also knows that I'm in a relationship). He's really into Opera,
Rennaisance art,and from MA as well. Who knows where this will go. We talked a little bit about meeting at a book store and getting coffee (as friends). Yesterday was a rather social day for me online. I caught up with a lot of people like Dolly,Thomas,Mark of course,Matt, and my little cousin Meghan. That was nice. I like to have interesting people in my life.
Today was a retail therapy day, and all of THIS came to less than $40...Night of the Living dead VHS,Vampire Hunter D VHS,HER(HIM)
Razorblade Romance CD,little coffin boxes that say "RIP",A fake raven to put next to my candles,A Dracula cup,black tights with crosses, and a gargoyle sign for my door that says "Abandon all hope ye who enter here." Wonderful, hmmm? hmm? ;)
Bye for now. I've been removing people from me friends list more and more, so if I remove you...please don't take it personally. If I had something personal against you, you would know.

~Tina

current mood: artistic
4 Tears * Rip my wings
Friday, September 19th, 2003
4:43 pm
The Potion Maker
BeautifulDiedium is a cloudy, crumbly mauve solid pulled from the pollen of a morning glory.
Mix with BeautifulDied! Username:
Yet another fun meme brought to you by rfreebern
1 Tear * Rip my wings
Wednesday, September 17th, 2003
7:55 pm
Things have gone on the past two days that I'd rather not discuss or share; things that are secret between my mother,Mark,and myself. I disappoint myself at times. Things are much better now though, I think that I'm my regular Lady Tina-ish self again =D hooray for that.
And Mark is feeling like himself again too.
Matt agreed to take mum and I to the Vampires and Victims ball October 29th.
Unto Ashes, one of my favourite bands, will be playing there. The only negative is that the
tickets are $75 each, but 'tis just worth it. This is my little splurge on myself, the rest is mostly to save or spend on gifts for Mark.
I can't wait to doll up even more than usual and surround myself with mostly intelligent beings with good taste in music and fashion =D
Today I took a trip to the Salvation Army and found a delicate white lace scarf and Red Dragon by Thomas Harris. I love Dr. Hannibal Lecter, he is too amazing! Not as amazing as Mark though ;)
Yesterday Matt came over to watch more movies, go to the mall and be an arcade dork while I read through Gothic beauty, and then just listen to music. Mark called me up in tears twice which broke my heart...but as I said, things are fine now. We are both our cheery selves.

~Tina

current mood: thoughtful
3 Tears * Rip my wings
Friday, September 12th, 2003
12:43 pm
A lot has been going on lately, and I've received a bit too much bad news. The first and most serious thing is my grand uncle,
Stevie, has Lou Gehrig's disease (a muscle disease) and is dying. With Lou Gehrig's disease all of your muscles slowly (or not so slowly) stop working. Eventually your arms stop working,you can't walk,you can have extreme difficulty breathing and swallowing. He's such a compassionate man who loves animals. I only see him a few times a year but still it saddens me a lot.
The next bad news is my young tomboyish cousin Meghan is being harassed a lot in school. People are calling her a "dyke" and a "short genderless freak." It bothers me a lot...she's so sweet to everyone. I sense that a lot of things are going to change in this
family. I sense a big change in general.
The day that Mark moves in with us grows nearer and nearer. Less than a year away! Finally I'll have someone that I love dearly to listen to music with,watch movies with,have hook or zip up the back of my corsets,have fix my barettes,walk through cemeteries and forests with,snuggle with under the black covers. Everynight I can scratch and massage his scalp like he loves,cook him a nice meal,listen to what he has to say,tell him about my day and cover him in kisses. I look forward to that so very much <3333 It's one of the things that keeps me alive. Lately we've been talking on the phone A LOT. 'Tis nice. We were talking the other night about how a lot of movies that are coming out look good, but we'd rather see them together so we are waiting 'til Winter and renting them together. We seem to want to see all of the same movies :) Gothika,Once upon a time in Mexico,Cabin Fever,Underworld (is that the name?), and whatever that somewhat dark looking movie with Heather Ledger is. I continue to forget the name of that Heath Ledger movie. It will be much nicer to see the movies in bed with Mark, rather than in a crowded theatre with people I don't know. Not that I don't enjoy the cinema at all...

What I got at Newbury Comics today -
- Bat Barettes with dark red stones by Shrine
- Christian Death "Wind kissed pictures" (Valor, but a good CD nonetheless)
- Dimmu Borgir "Enthroned Darkness Triumphant"

Tina

current mood: refreshed
10 Tears * Rip my wings
Wednesday, September 10th, 2003
6:46 pm
I was so happy to talk to my beloved manfriend (Markie) today. I was watching more movies with Matt yesterday and bought an H.P. Lovecraft book, so I wasn't online at all :'( Atleast today I was, and we talked on the phone so I was able to hear his gorgeous deep voice. Hearing his voice brings me warmth and happiness.
I feel so tired today. I literally feel like all of my energy is being drained out of my body at a terrifyingly high speed, but I'm still in good spirits. This isn't over depression, or even boredom. Usually I'm energetic on full moons.
Tomorrow is the dreaded September 11th, everyone keep your televisions off.
Yes it was a tragedy and I feel sorry for the victims, but must we keep poking at a dead horse? I mostly feel sorry for the families of the victims because of constantly being reminded of their loss with the mainstream's All American fake sympathy. It makes me sick to my stomach.

Love,
Tina

current mood: cheerful
1 Tear * Rip my wings
6:42 pm - What in the name of BACCHUS are you doing?
I think that it's literally impossible to not have any flaws. Our flaws make us beautiful. If you have "no flaws", then there is your flaw right there...
1 Tear * Rip my wings
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